Each of us makes many decisions each and every day, what time to wake up, what to wear, what to have for breakfast, and what time to leave for work or other commitments.
And if you have a partner and or children, times that a hundredfold! We often make these daily decisions seemingly on autopilot without too much effort because we generally have all the information we need and an awareness of the consequences if we miss our timing. And we often have an informal backup plan too, whether we are consciously aware of it or not.
When it comes to the bigger decisions in our lives, for example, to leave a job to take a chance on another – our dream job, to buy a house or continue to rent, to start or end a relationship, it becomes more difficult. These decisions become much more complex and have potentially more far-reaching consequences.
When facing an important life-changing decision and wanting to move forward, it’s common to feel stuck in fear and doubt, with a tendency to overthink things and go over all the reasons why whatever we want to do can’t be done. Why are the decisions we make every day often so simple that we barely even think about them, but the big decisions can feel like pressure?
When I feel like that, I step back from the situation, take a few deep breaths and consider why I am feeling like that. Is this something I really want to do? I often find that instead of focusing on brainstorming to create a list, I am creating pressure for myself by minutely analyzing each point as I go. I just get lost down a rabbit hole, thinking of all the things that could go wrong instead of approaching it rationally.
When I relax and list all the information first, then organize it into positives and challenges, taking into account all considerations and making sure I fill in all the gaps before I move forward, I put myself back in control.
Here are some tips:
- Goal – what do you really want, can you picture it? Be really clear on what you want to achieve.
- What is your driving force – the why, your motive – is it clear and positive for yourself, does it feel good?
- Does it fit your long-term goals for yourself?
- Is the timing right?
- Gather the facts.
Don’t rush. Take all the time you need to gather all the relevant information. When you have all the information you need, you will be able to make an informed decision and move forward confidently, knowing you have covered all your bases.
